Nina

I joined Paul for a jog this afternoon. It felt good to get the exercise. As usual he has the better endurance. I can go for short spurts, and he can keep it up for longer distances. I was often left trailing behind him, at one point grabbing his arm and instructing him to tug me along. :P

I've been thinking about going back to having just one journal again. The joys of being indecisive. I have a permanent account here on LJ too, so I might as well use it to its full potential. If I go ahead with it, this may involve having to move some of you guys over to that other journal. Gah. Sorry! :S

After finding out that our car was worth $22,300 brand new in 2000, we decided we should definitely keep up with its maintenance eight years later. We got some amazing winter tires for it this past winter (such an improvement over the previous ones which couldn't grip at all in any sort of snow; made for very scary driving), and while I was away in Toronto Paul purchased some new low-profile (ouch, bumpy) performance tires and rims. :) Next we want to do some body work and get rid of some of the rust spots, as well as get some new rotors and break pads.

( +3 photos )

I have never figured out why me trying to understand and work around my mental health problems and learn to accept myself and my limitations has made some people conclude that this makes me a failure with a pathetic life to be ashamed of. That I was better off when I was in denial and just going through the motions, pretending I was just like everyone else. I personally feel that although life can be a struggle for me, with many setbacks and obstacles to overcome, I do feel safe and loved and that I am making small steps at progress and actually moving forward. And that suits me just fine. I don't have a need to go down in history, just to simply find some contentment out of life.

I have learned so much about myself that sometimes it blows me away to reflect upon all that I have uncovered in such a short amount of time. In a lot of ways I feel like a completely different person, when really I'm just uncovering my true self for the very first time. With my eyes and my mind now fully opened, accepting of both the good and the bad in myself. All I can say is that I hope having such strong opinions about others at least achieves some sort of good for the person holding them, perhaps allowing them to feel good about themselves and enjoy their own lives more, feeling in their hearts that they are better than the rest of us. Who knows.

Two articles have been posted in the Belleville Intelligencer about the incident on my trainride home Monday. My mum found the first article, and I found the second one. I guess we've both been thinking about it a lot..
http://www.intelligencer.ca/ArticleDisplay.aspx?e=1067207&auth=Henry+Bury
http://www.intelligencer.ca/ArticleDisplay.aspx?e=1067890 (this should say an eastbound train to Ottawa)

( The two articles under the lj-cut... )

( Read more... )

Edit: I've since removed some of these posts from my Twitter archive, it's probably a bit much. I just needed somewhere to vent while sitting in an unmoving train for several hours while going crazy in my head! :/

10:29 Another hot sunny day! woo-hoo, summer is here! :) i'm a hot weather girl. :D #

14:04 Tomatoes have been banned. Burgers are not the same. :P #

16:03 Having a fun time shopping, although I haven't bought anything yet. not even after an hour at Abercrombie & Fitch! :O #

18:58 We had a good day of shopping and finished up just before the mall closed. Found some nice things for Pauly too. Out for dinner in a bit. #

20:32 Tornado warning?! Heavy winds? Hail? Vicious weather? ...TORNADO?!!? O_O #

20:54 Is heading out on foot, regardless of tornados, in search of dinner. :P #

22:51 Managed to miss all the nasty weather. Saw a pretty rainbow on the way out too. Went to a pub for dinner. Mmm, beer. :) #

18:30 On the train, eating my chips. I miss my hubby already! #

20:32 Is amusing herself on the train, just turned on my Garmin GPS to see our travels on the map. 160 Km/h. Ooh. :P #

22:44 Our train has been delayed at Guildwood due to some "police operation" on the tracks. Toronto.. so far.. away..! #

For my mum's birthday I have also put together a photo album which contains 32 photos taken in our garden. ( Here they are in all their thumbnail glory... )

If you would like to see any of these shots in non-thumbnail format just let me know and I will upload a decent-sized photo.

I originally had 24 but just sent off 8 more to be printed at Costco, along with a photo of my hair from my graduation ceremony last year to show my stylist for when I get my hair cut tomorrow. :)

With the power outage I ended up having watermelon for dinner, so I'm off to see what else I can grab now that we have the use of oven and microwave again! ..Although all I can think about is having more watermelon.. *facepalm* :P

June 3 (Bloomberg) -- Barack Obama clinched the Democratic presidential nomination on the final night of primaries that brought an end to his historic campaign against Hillary Clinton.

"Tonight we mark the end of one historic journey with the beginning of another," Obama, 46, said in a speech tonight to a crowd estimated at 32,000 in St. Paul, Minnesota. "Tonight, I can stand before you and say that I will be the Democratic nominee for president of the United States."

WOO!

I just started watching the PBS special Depression, Out of the Shadows (you can download the torrent on Mininova or watch it streaming from the website). ( Just wanted to share two parts that I could totally relate to... )

Lastly I'd like to add a link to befrienders.org, which is a site you can go to if you are really struggling with your depression, at which point you should really talk to somebody- whether it be via a crisis hotline or email. Befrienders has the resources for you. ♥

I am looking forward to my trip to Toronto for my mum's birthday weekend. :) We are totally broke but somehow I still expect to get some good shopping in. (?!?!!) I am eager to check out the following stores which we don't have in Ottawa:

- Sephora (ok, we may have one of these at the mall downtown by now)
- Abercrombie & Fitch
- H&M
- FCUK
- Hollister
- Pottery Barn
- Coach
- Bubble Tease (mmm bubble tea, lol)
- I also want to see if I can find some Spanx! They fold away your muffin top and thighs to make you appear slimmer. :P

I will also be attending Woofstock and checking out what sort of things they will have for dogs there. :) I am hoping to get in touch with our local rescue groups too as something I might like to get involved in later on down the road.

Way too often I am seeing people being antagonized online and made to feel like shit by people they thought were their friends. It breaks my heart because life is enough of a challenge when you are struggling with mental illness, which can bring you to a very dark place. I struggle with this myself, which is why it hits a nerve when I see this happening to my friends. What kind of person goes out of their way to make these people's lives any more miserable? "You hate yourself? Well guess what, so do we!" Way to be. I hope you feel like a superior being now. Don't forget to kick a senior on your way out.

I really wish people could learn communicate with each other normally. You have a problem with someone, you feel hurt or wronged in some way, you flat-out tell them so. Simple as that. No mind games, no ganging up on them with peer pressure. Don't go out of your way to make this person hate themselves as much as you do. Just tell them you have a problem, and either you can patch it up or you can't.

As for my friends dealing with this, I just have to say that I find your strength and perseverance to be an inspiration.

Back from one appointment, off to another one after I grab a quick bite to eat. And so begins my weekend full of "stuff". I feel drained just thinking about it. @__@

Yeah, me being med-free is really no longer an option at this point. :/

1) How old were you?
THEN: 16 going on 17. :)
NOW: Turning 27 this September.

( Looking back, am I where I thought I would be...? )

I got my first issue of Dogs in Canada magazine in the mail today! :D I decided to go ahead and try out a one-year subscription. These are the mags I used to love reading on my breaks at work, often getting so caught up in the articles, completely forgetting that I only had 15 minutes, lol!

Two things that grabbed my attention in this month's issue were (1) an ad for Places4Paws, a site which shows on a Google map all sorts of pet-friendly locations for people out and about with their dogs. From off-leash parks (I was surprised to see there are quite a few in my area) to pet-friendly accommodations and restaurants, as well as veterinary clinics. Very handy, I just had to pass that along! And (2) an ad for Woofstock, this giant outdoor festival in Toronto for people and their dogs. Not so close to home but sounds like fun! Might also be a good opportunity for me to establish some contacts in my 'field' as well as work on my networking, if I'm feeling brave enough to do this on my own..

Lastly, Paul and I have been discussing the possibility of adding another dog to our family in the future, probably a smaller breed which should be just fine. Pepper gets along with dogs of all sizes. It would be a rescue too, of course. Ultimately we are hoping that the addition of another dog will help bring Pepper out of her shell and boost her confidence a bit, and that the two dogs' personalities would complement one another in such a way that they bring out each other's best qualities and strengths. Not something we are going to rush into right away, we'll need to wait 'til we're a bit better off, but something positive and exciting to consider and look forward to. I have also been thinking about fostering dogs for animal shelters as another option while they wait for adoption, which would be a very rewarding experience in itself. We'll see.

Sharing this blog on Facebook? Too weird. LJ and Facebook should be kept separately, even if I do have posts that are publicly accessible on here. People on Facebook want to read about my completely uneventful life? They may enter LiveJournal-world and are free to do so. That just felt really weird and, yes, is the reason I was peacefully asleep in bed one second and all of a sudden awake and anxious the next. o_O

I've had many experiences rescuing strays, but by far this is the one which stands out the most in my mind. And emotional and rewarding experience which solidifies in my mind my love of animals and my commitment to helping them in whatever ways I can. ( Read more... )